BUNGS Tour 2003 - North Norfolk
Friday 27th to Sunday 29th June 2003

The weekend tour for the 2003 season took us to Norfolk where we played a three wonderful courses, Royal Norwich, Royal Cromer and Sheringham.  As usual, we were split into two teams and played a 'ryder cup' style match.

The teams and results for the weekend were as follows.

Friday 27th June - morning
Royal Norwich Golf Club
1 x singles match (over 10 holes)
6 x foursome-greensome matches (over 13 holes)

The 2003 BUNGS Tour to Norfolk started with everyone in great spirits, with bright sunshine on the first morning at Royal Norwich and an excellent weather forecast for the rest of the weekend.

The vast majority had already attempted to ‘groove’ their swings by travelling a day early with rounds being played at various courses in the area including Gorleston, Brancaster and Hunstanton. Four mad individuals (Steve Lloyd, Karl Hughes, John Shaw and James Shipman) even played 36 holes to ‘warm themselves up’. Despite the quality of the courses, playing 36 holes proved to be a mistake for Steve and James as the strong coastal wind destroyed both players’ swings. James also had the humiliation of losing a tidy packet in the morning ‘skins’ games (both on the putting green and on the course itself), with Karl Hughes’ pockets being the main recipient of James’s cash.

When the teams were announced by the two captains, it appeared that the Blue team had an advantage from the start as John Shaw had obviously done his homework and picked the players with the better ‘win ratios’ from previous tours. However, past form doesn’t count for anything, and it was all up for grabs as the opening tee-shots were struck on the par 3 1st at Royal Norwich.

What turned out to be the closest BUNGS weekend ever started with the Friday morning greensomes, which were to be contested over ten holes. With one player short for the Friday, there was one singles match between Ian Talboys and Tim Thacker to start things off, with Reg Mansell accompanying them for a practice round. This first match set the standard for the weekend with Ian Talboys getting up and down from 25 yards to half the 150 yard 1st in seven. Unfortunately Reg only managed to get up quite some time after going down on the approach to the 3rd tee after overturning his scooter, sorry buggy, on the steps. Even after accelerating to its top speed of ‘toddler’ in an attempt to climb the steep slope, the single seater buggy refused to behave and Reg was thankful to Tim who caught Reg before any serious damage was done. The match eventually continued with Reg last seen disappearing over the horizon towards Norwich City Centre. Ian finally won a tight match 2/1.

Richard Stevens and John Mansell knew they would have their work cut-out against a very strong pairing of Martyn Dodwell and Karl Hughes and this proved to be the case. The match was tight however and it was only a win at the final hole that secured a 2 and 1 victory for the Green team pair.

By pure coincidence, the two team captains had been drawn against each other in their opening games. Ably partnered by Howard Holliday and Ivan Heathcote, the match contained some quality golf, resulting in a morale boosting 2/1 victory for John and Howard.

Chris Craddy and Colin Ringer were up against very formidable opponents in the highly consistent partnership of John Newton and Graham Bilsland. Colin and Chris were receiving a number of shots though and they used these wisely in another tight match going down the last hole, where a win at the par 5 10th secured a victory for John and Graham.

The fifth match of the morning saw Darren Weston and Graeme Black take on a strong blue pairing of Andy Smith and Bobby Ho. Graeme was a last minute replacement on the tour for Mike Fox, who unfortunately had to drop-out with back problems. Andy had heard all about Graeme ‘the crab’ Black and his wayward shots and entered the match in a confident mood. Things started well for the Blue pairing going 1up at the first and then halving the 2nd against the Green pair’s shot. After that it all became a bit of a struggle. ‘The Crab’s’ tee shots were, more often than not, as long and straight as a railway line and Smithy’s inconsistencies again came to the fore. With Bobby missing a simple 18inch uphill putt on the 8th to square the match, the Blue pair stood on the 9th tee 1down and faced the prospect of having to take Andy’s tee shot. After hitting a solid iron into the heart of the green, the Blue pair sensed the pressure was beginning to tell of Graeme and Darren. First Darren’s tee shot flirted with the trees all down the left before coming to rest short and in a terrible lie. Graham pulled his shot way left into the trees, never to be seen again. Walking to the green, Smith turns to Bobby and confidently states ‘we make a three here and we’ve won the hole’. Graham arrives at where Darren’s tee shot had come to rest and doesn’t like the look of the lie. However, he somehow chips in to win the match 2/1, although with all the jumping around, hugging and kissing that went on, you’d have thought they had just retained the Ryder Cup for Europe, not won their first match on the BUNGS tour.

Gordon Sullivan arrived at the course straight from home after a 5am start in a bit of a panic over his car, as his central locking had packed-up and he couldn’t get his fuel cap open. Despite several desperate phone calls to the local Saab dealer, Gordon’s problem wasn’t solved and he was really starting to panic so Steve Lloyd said he’d have a look at it for him. Steve got Gordon to unlock the boot and proceeded to remove the toolbox from the right hand side of the boot (next to the fuel cap). Gordon kept insisting that this wasn’t correct and all Steve was doing was removing the toolbox. Once removed, and much to the relief of Gordon, right behind the toolbox was the orange emergency release lever for the fuel cap, exactly where the Saab dealer had told Gordon where to look 30 minutes previously. With Gordon having half an hour to ‘calm down’, he was ready for the off, partnered by Barry Whitmore. Their opponents found trouble straight away, with Brian Keates finding sand off the tee and Alan Tolley nearly decapitating the gardener who was cutting the edges on the putting green, much to the delight of the watching spectators. After losing the first, both Alan and Brian topped their drives at the 2nd into bushes to go 2 down after 2, which quickly became 4 down against consistent opponents. Even when Alan and Brian did get on the green in 2 shots (at the 6th) Gordon, who has more woods than The Forestry Commission, played one of his speciality 15-wood shots to 8 feet for a half. The match ended on the next hole with an easy 5 and 3 victory for the Blue pairing.

The final match of the morning saw Steve Lloyd & Paul Weston (two players who had won all their matches in last years tour) play Paul Herrmann and John Bayliss. The quality of the golf was nothing to write home about, and trips to the bunkers were plentiful with both pairings finding sand at the first. Paul Herrmann also hit bunkers with his tee-shots at holes 2 and 3, but with his partner driving straight down the middle, they took a 2up lead with an early birdie. On reaching the par 5 7th, John’s second shot found the greenside bunker and they needed an ‘up and down’ to go dormie 3. However, four shots later and he ball was still in the sand, as both Paul and John took two attempts each to try (and fail) to get the ball out, much to the amusement of Steve and Paul. This didn’t throw the Bayliss/Herrmann partnership as they came back in fine style with a 40foot breaking putt for birdie by John to win the 8th to go dormie 2. A simple par at the 117 yard 9th secured the match 2/1 and they went on to further demoralise their opponents by scoring an eagle 3 whilst ‘playing in’ at the 10th.

Friday 27th June - afternoon
Royal Norwich Golf Club
1 x singles match (over 18 holes)
6 x fourball-betterball matches (over 18 holes)

After some wonderful baps at lunchtime which kept everyone’s eyes on full alert, the afternoon was to consist of four-ball better-ball matches (starting from the 11th tee) but, once again, due to being one short on the Friday, there was to be one singles match between Martyn Dodwell and John Mansell. Martyn had already defeated John in the morning greensomes and the consistent play of Dodwell, combined with the anything but consistent play of Mansell, meant a comfortable 4/3 victory for Martyn. Martyn did manage to keep the whole field waiting by taking 5 minutes to change into his full waterproof suit and to attach the waterproof cover to his trolley bag, this despite there only being the slightest drops of rain in the air (the only rain we had all weekend). Martyn soon realised his mistake two minutes later when the rain stopped and had to pack everything away later that hole.

The opening fourball match between John Shaw/Gordon Sullivan and Tim Thacker/Ivan Heathcote looked a close one on paper but proved to be anything but. Ivan’s golf deteriorated more and more as the match went on, and a ‘double hit’ out of a greenside bunker culminating in a tirade of club throwing and swearing not seen since the heydays of Ian Talboys. Tim had already conceded the match on the next tee and spent the rest of the day threatening to go home after another disastrous ‘nil point’ start to a BUNGS tour by Thacker junior. Ivan spent the rest of the day in the hotel bar and sank more drinks than putts and was great entertainment to all those in the bar after 11pm that evening.

The match between Ian Talboys/Richard Stevens and James Shipman/Graham Bilsland got off to a great start with a birdie for Graham to win the 1st hole, even though he was giving shots to both Ian and Richard. Ian ‘spat his dummy’ early doors after his drive at the 13th (their 3rd) wasn’t found, but Richard who not only looked like God, but played like him for much of the match, was in great form and proved a calming influence on the volatile Tally, demonstrated by Richard winning the hardest hole on the course with a 12 inch gross birdie putt. Ian and Richard also had help from teammates in other matches, as Howard Holliday hit his second shot to the 8th (their 16th) with the match in front still on the green. With Graham standing over a birdie putt, Howard’s ball rolled straight across the line of Graham’s putt, much to his disgust. However, Graham held his nerve to reduce the deficit to one down with two to play but unfortunately neither Graham or James could hold theirs at the final hole, having to settle for a half to lose the match 1 down, leaving the Green team captain pointless after day one. Richard was delighted to have won and our very own God/Santa look-alike’s day was made when he persuaded the hotel’s Austrian waitress to sit on his knee.

With Howard hitting shots further that he could believe (see above match report), you would have thought that he and Barry Whitmore would be having a good display against John Newton and Darren Weston. The match proved to be very tight and it went down the last hole, but despite Howard’s ‘monstrous’ iron shots, it was John and Darren who triumphed 1up, meaning a 100% start for both of them.

After their morning successes Karl Hughes and Graham Black must have fancied their chances against Colin Ringer and Bobby Ho, players who has both lost their morning matches. However, the consistent play of Colin and the occasional flash of brilliance from Bobby secured a win for the Blue pair. Karl was so dispirited with his afternoon performance, he was pleading with Martyn Dodwell (former assistant pro) to give him some advice over dinner. Karl was very disappointed however when Martyn’s best advice was to use 3-wood off the tee, instead of Karl’s new expensive driver – not what Karl wanted to hear.

Andy Smith and Steve Lloyd were expecting a confidence boosting win over John Bayliss and Brian Keates and things started well with a birdie 2 for Steve at the 12th (their 2nd), but things were not so easy for the rest of the round. With Brian playing out of his skin and John being as consistent as ever whenever Brian lapsed, things looked bleak for the Blue pair, especially with Steve’s game now in tatters. Steve was concentrating very hard on the match and trying to rectify his game, demonstrated at the 3rd (their 11th) when, after clipping his second shot 115 yards from the fairway bunker onto the front of the elevated green, Steve allowed himself a smile of appreciation as he puts his sand iron into his bag, places the strap over his shoulder and starts to walk toward the green. It’s only then that Steve realises he’s forgotten that he hired a trolley for the day and was looking a right donut carrying both bag and trolley down the fairway. Even before this, Andy was already smiling as his good run of pars around the turn kept the match tight. Steve finally produced a good shot putting a 6 iron to 3 feet at the 5th (their 13th) for birdie, but this only kept the match all square as John got a four nett three. The next two holes proved to be crucial with Brian having trouble in greenside bunkers and John finally messing up on the same holes to lose both of them. A half at the 10th (their 17th) was enough to secure victory for Steve and Andy.

The final fourball match of the day between Alan Tolley/Paul Herrmann and Chris Craddy/Paul Weston proved to be the tightest of the weekend, but it looked far from tight as Alan started 4-4-4 and was 2 up before their opponents had time to blink. After a blistering start, the match was pretty closely fought although Alan and Paul always had opportunities to go further ahead (Alan missed a 3 footer for a win at the 4th). At the 7th, with Paul Weston behind a bush in 2 and with no chance of a shot to the green, Paul Herrmann pitches to 10 feet for what looked like another win for the green pairing. However, Paul Weston chipped out backwards onto the fairway and from 180 yards, put a 5 iron to 18 inches for a much needed half. With the Green’s 2 up with 4 to play, Chris Craddy decided it was time to ‘get nasty’ and holed an outrageous 30 foot putt across and down the slope for a win, which gave the Blue pair some confidence at 1 down with 3 to play. Despite Alan having chances to wrap things up at the next two holes, he failed to get down in two from the edge of the 16th and left a putt for the match at the hole’s edge on 17, the match ended all square when Chris won the last with a 6 nett 5 for the only halved game of the entire weekend.

Whilst Ivan spent the evening drowning his sorrows in the hotel bar, some of the BUNGS contingent went scouring Sheringham for ‘a bit of action’. After finding a half decent pub, James Shipman went on to suffer his third defeat of the day – at pool to a local female hustler, much to the amusement of the assembled crowd.

Quotes of the day

"What’s wrong with winking" – Who knows what was going through Ivan Heathcote’s mind as he drunkenly blurts this out in the bar late on Friday evening (vowels may have been changed to protect the guilty).

"It’s okay, this thing can do a 4 in 1 climb" – Reg Mansell just before he came a cropper on the steps/slope to the third tee in his shopping cart/golf buggy.

"Fuc*ing" blind holes" – Ian at the 13th in the afternoon after his drive was never found.

"I had a trial for Norwich City you know" – with a very excitable John Newton back in his homeland, he took great pleasure in reminding everyone how he was the East Anglian equivalent of Nobby Stiles.

"You’re joking aren’t you, you must be joking" – Brian Keates after being that he would be penalised and lose the hole after he ripped a spike mark off his line. Brian didn’t realise that you couldn’t do this and his face was an absolute picture (we didn’t penalise him in the end).

"It’s that fine rain – it soaks you though" – Martyn Dodwell as he unnecessarily changed into his waterproofs.